3184.) Okay I smoke cigarettes. I know they kill you, but I don’t care. I want to die. I want to die painfully. I’m tired of putting happiness into things that fuck up. I don’t feel anything anymore. Smoking helps me feel, even if only for 5-10 minutes. If I have to get lung cancer to feel again, I will…and by the way fucker, when I told you I was going to quit, I LIED.
In 6th grade, I broke up with my first boyfriend. He became my best friend. Six years later at our high school graduation, he makes his valedictorian speech.The last thing he says? “Maddy, I never stopped loving you. Its been six years… Can we try again?” We just celebrated our 50th anniversary together.